Saturday, October 30, 2010

Tale of a Nightingale - 2


(contd. from http://vishwini.blogspot.com/2010/10/tale-of-nightingale-1.html)
......Shivering Sumathi wasn’t able to speak anything. Her heart almost stopped beating when Maitri's heart opened up her expressions. Maitri was also silent, for a different reason. It was tough, but she was well prepared for having raged a war. Sumathi didn’t want to utter a word until her husband returned from work that day. When he returned, he soon was able to make out that something wasn’t right with that war of silence. Sumathi still was half unconscious when he dragged both of them into conversation. Maitri was always confident that her father would be on her side, and that her mother who loves her so much wouldn’t be able to live without her. Once he understood the situation, he was dumb for a moment and then for the next 2-3 hours, everyone continuously kept talking, shouting, screaming and crying.”Did you ever think how your parents will take this?” … “Appa, what is the problem of loving him? He is a very nice guy and the best of all I have seen. He loves and cares for me so much and can live or die for me and what else you need?”  “Where are they from?” He asked taking a deep breath. “From Punjab,…” She replied. Sumathi joined, “Didn’t you get any one other than these terrorists, girl???…We wouldn’t have forced you to marry anyone!!!” “Come on maa,, they are not terrorists.. In fact they served our nation in wars against Pakistan…The real patriots.. tell me one good reason why shouldn’t I marry him? He has been recruited into a very good company just like me, loves me deeply and takes care of me whatever the consequence it may be”..


“.. Do you know they eat cows, goats and pigs..” Sumathi’s eyes continued to be wet for hours.
“I never asked what all they eat,, ma… you know what? Trust me, if I don’t like, he will never bring any meat inside our house or ask me to cook…and above that, they speak Hindi too, and not just Punjabi.. and he’s promised that he would completely learn Kannada soon and won’t object on anything in future on my interests, literature, culture or music..” “Our house???!!!! What do you mean, ‘our house’?? You are already talking about your house? Oh my god!!!!” Sumathi had another shock treatment! Closed her eyes and fell on the sofa, one more time. 
 

Dad was silent most of the time, he knew they would become her “past” very soon, and she is going to get some one else as her future.. “but how could I allow her to choose anyone just like that?? I need to care for her 'present' at least.. After all, we took the best care of her till date and wouldn’t it make us in anyway to request her making the right decision??” My dear,, we gave you everything you wanted; Gave you much needed education, culture, music, bought you what all you just thought of having…Kinetic Honda, Keyboard, Tanpura,….You always asked us whenever you wanted something.. Why didn’t you ask us in this case, my dear??” “Come on dad,, this is not something we get in the market, we don’t go out and buy friends, I didn’t buy him…I loved him…” Sumathi joined the conversation, “There are hundreds of guys that we can get.. Many of our distant relatives who have well qualified sons settled in the US match your horoscope as well and eagerly looking forward to …” “I beg you ma….I don’t need hundreds of your guys. I just need one Guri..I don’t need anyone in the US..’ she started desperately pleading, ‘I knew it was difficult, but didn’t think you would be so harsh to me, ma…”  Maitri now started crying…

Dad kept on thinking… May be, we never allowed her to face any difficulties in life. We provided her all that she wanted.. So, must have chosen to find something which was hard to get. That’s how probably the life is. Need to have both happiness and sorrow/challenges/difficulties in equal proportions. That’s where thrill comes into picture. 6 balls 10 runs to win, 2 wkts in hand, is what we expect to see in life. An easy victory is just too boring. We shouldn’t get everything we desire. She mustn’t be having time to think of all this love, probably if she had seen the real difficult situations??? If you have everything in life, it is probably the secret meet or the stiff opposition that it self gives life a thrill and kick? Is it too late now to act anything? OR do I still have time to repair the damage? Will she listen to my moral bedtime stories or has she crossed that stage?” 
  
The night of fight went on till the chirping of birds could be heard early in the morning … and every one went to sleep without a conclusion… Sumathi was the first one to get up when the milkman arrived. She could only think of Kanaka dasa’s composition referring to Lord Krishna, “Ene manvithe lalithangi, Asamaana govala kulavilladavanolu…”. As a father, he had his own set of thoughts running around his mind - what to do as a father. Should I try explaining her that, these kind of attraction shouldn’t be taken to the alliance level OR should I ask her to get him to their place and explain both of them in a sensible way how unpractical this could get to, OR just as a modern dad allow whatever she wants to do and attend her wedding as a guest OR just wait and watch...Sumathi never imagined that her daughter will overstep her trust..Ever since Maitri was born, Sumathi had raised her as a friend...At her 7 years, she was prepared to accompany her mom as vocal support in concerts. The mother-daughter duo performance travelled through out Karnataka and some parts of Maharashtra for various music festivals. She wasn’t just a daughter, but a student, a close and dear friend too. The words ‘You are so stubborn ma. NEVER CHANGE!!!!” kept on lingering in Sumathi’s ears… “Was that my fault? Am I so stubborn?? If I’m stubborn, then what about my daughter?? Isn’t she stubborn??? Did she pick it from me??? It was my sheer perseverance and commitment, with hardly anyone’s help that I had made it to the Akashvani doors when I was of her age. I have had so of struggle to get a single opportunity. Why doesn’t she put in the same perseverance in those things instead of this? And she’s now calling me stubborn. Oh God… please please come to my rescue… How can I allow those turban guys taking away my daughter? Whenever I think of this, I just collapse, how could she even do this to me??” Both of her parents were not in a position or mood to comfortably talk to her for days together after receiving that shock treatment. 


All these days, Sumathi had never bothered much when he used to call their landline as she was unable to listen to any of their telephonic conversations due to the bass sound of Tabla or the high frequencies of her female students. She had also failed to capture Maitri’s naughty blushing faces during those calls. In fact they had enjoyed the soothing background score of Rageshri or Desh during their romantic telephonic late evening chat. But things weren’t the same anymore once Sumathi opened her wide eyelids. Every call went for scrutiny; every move was monitored; every step was followed though the smarter Maitri gradually found her own ways of tricking people around her. Some times, her close friend Ayesha starts off the call during Sumathi’s scanner and later paved the way for Guri to continue. It created storm every time he sent her gift on special occasions when he was not in Bangalore. She had to produce the ‘on the fly’ reasons on their birthdays or Valentine’s Day to successfully fulfill her accomplishment of meeting him amidst much of opposition, fight and disturbance. The perfume that he brought from his Atlanta trip exclusively for her only created bad aroma at her house. Initially she had to hide and slowly release the gifts he sent - Swiss watch, attractive gold chain and pendant, expensive diamond ring, organizer, Minolta camera etc. to reduce the sudden damage. Her everyday call with him was the only tonic of hope beating all of her daily fights and mental torture she went thru as part of her daily menu card. Everyday she positively starts off with yet another hopeful application attempt to her mother for approval ending up in yet again a dejected situation. When she hardly stole any personal time to devote herself for him, she had to appear offline while chatting with him and find reasons for not meeting or responding to her other childhood friends, classmates and relatives who equally demanded her time. Along with her existing ongoing problems, she also had to pacify and keep them as well happy. 

Sustainability of any relationship many a times depends on the common problems the couple possess. As both of them carried the common problem, there was absolutely no issue in sustaining the healthy relationship between the two amidst the incompatibilities existed.  In most of the everyday or alternate day meets, the point of discussion would be their common problems and the ways of convincing their parents to take the relationship to the next level or the next steps to be taken making the relationship fresh, active and thrill. The level of bondage was always directly proportional to the amount of hard resistance one faced. I remember a song from an Mahesh Bhatt’s old movie, Sadak, “Jo pyar karne walonko jab jab duniya tadpaayegi.. mohabath badtee jaayegi..” That’s true I guess. The common problems convincingly kept aside all other practical issues keeping their relationship intact and stronger. In the western countries, relationship of a couple often won’t sustain may be because things are quite smooth and there is hardly any resistance like what we have here. Hence, when everything is perfect, we ourselves will create issues to have that balanced thrilled life we seek. Well, just my analysis. ;-)

In spite of revamping himself to meet her likes and demands, Guri yet secretly felt unsecured that being a traditional girl with multiple complexities, Maitri may turn back anytime owing to her family bondage and parental emotional Athyachar. Hence, he had to constantly make his presence felt around her, prove his love and support and bring her back to his side every time she leaned on the other side. Even during his brief US visits on project work, he had to make quite sure she waited for him every single minute and didn’t fall for her mother's emotional tears or ragas.
He had kept aside 10% of his dollar earnings on calling cards during his multiple entry visits to the US post Y2K implementation, to maintain their relationship active and interesting. His main strength of charm and vocabulary skills never allowed her to get out of his main orbit even though he was revolving 16,000 kms away from her during his frequent US visits. His supportive and confident words during messenger chat sessions continuously boosted her trust and helped stay focused to her commitment. Though Maitri never suspected of Guri’s fallback options, her concern was more towards the acceptance from her own folks and hence kept her dilemma doors always opened. What happens if her parents never give blessings was the constant fear she carried at every step of her day to day life. “I definitely don’t want to elope and get married. But if I don’t have any other option, what to do?.. ” As her story slowly became a well known tale among all of her friends and relatives, the shy girl didn’t have to hide anymore. The same girl, who once was so scared of somebody noticing her with Guri, now expresses her relationship in public without a fear or a concern of her tainted image. Everyday, she tried in vain convincing her reluctant parents. All this time, the go-getter girl had never failed in getting anything or anyone. Now it’s her turn to cry inside, the moment she realize what was happening around her. She can’t just betray and run away, can’t accept this defeat, can’t convince them, can’t live a hopeless life like this and can’t afford to loose him when she had completely offered herself to him. Oh..what about music? After all, she hasn’t touched her Tanpura specially imported from Banaras, for ages now. The only thing she could do was cry hard and deep inside whenever she heard her mother’s pet student singing Rag Jaunpuri upstairs and then optimistically look for another dawn and night. Naturally, people who stood by her way supporting her relationship with him, became her closest friends while she gently avoided those who tried suggesting to listen to her parents and not to fall for any of these love traps. When we need ‘heads’ in a coin, we try to choose a coin of both ‘heads’ before tossing so we legally get what we want. 
 
When her story reached my ears, it only substantiated my theory of “Beautiful girls hardly remain single :)”. The best in the market is always sold first even if it is priced high, which is another rule of nature. Yes, guys normally can’t tolerate looking at an attractive girl being single. So, a girl has to continuously reject a guy’s proposal; be it her neighbor, or her classmate or friend or a relative or even a total stranger. Well, some guys keep on trying even after the rejection, thanks to the inspiration from our movies that make them think they will succeed one day, while others only make an attempt if someone fails and stops if rejected. Probability of falling for this trap is even more when your striking movements are more casual and attractive. Sapnil, her extremely talented team mate always thought she was only close to him when she appeared very casual and shared few things only with him. As Sapnil was probably the only one who could match her skill level, he had started dreaming till all his Sapne’s were shattered one day when she disclosed reality. Suvendu, probably younger than her also fell for her moves when he realized she had maintained a special account with him. Every time, guys thought she considered them as special and legally made the bold move before she could cut them off. In reality, she wasn’t close to anyone except Guri. At times, I thought she must be extremely intelligent when I found her with the ways of keeping guys away from her and not giving any opportunity to meet in private. At the same time thought, was she that ignorant not to notice guys falling for her? Anyways, the best option for a girl is probably to accept someone dear to her and whom she could trust and can also act as shield and prevent from others approaching her. I don’t know of the case here, but I raised my collar as my theory at least didn’t go wrong. Well, I know love is blind; but I wondered those days, how could a girl from this traditional background whose family probably considered meat eating as the greatest crime of human life, could ever decide to lead her life after falling for a totally opposite pole Sardar, never heard of any of Pt. Bhimsen Joshi’s Khyals or Bandish’s and don’t even speak her mother tongue. I had always assumed, her first crush would probably be some one like Ustad Zakir Hussein or the 'Saregama' host of those days, Sonu Nigam…Well..he must be really lucky I thought, not because of getting a super girl or a talent hub, but someone who’s ready to leave behind her entire world for him; including her dear parents who consider their only daughter as their only hope, her music and art she inherited from her very first breath, her relatives and friends who stood by her even when she did wrong to them, her city that she was born and brought up, her mother tongue that she was always proud of, her career... well the list goes on.. She was ready to sacrifice everything for a person.. Hmm, like I said, that's what love is. 

Sumathi felt, where did all that culture/Samskara that she tried to teach her go?? She remembered all those happy memories of Maitri right from the day she was born, the day she started toddling, her first step when Sumathi held her right hand assisting her first move, her sleepless sick nights during her cold and cough days, her first Bilawal raag, her first performance, her first day at the elementary school, her first Kitturu chennamma drama, her competitions, carrying her sturdy tanpura on their Bajaj Vespa for the music scholarship exams, taking her to the circus, cinema, holding umbrella for her when themselves were getting drenched, how they enrolled her to the English medium school..well,, the list never ends for a parent.. I have always been so proud of her and this is what she has given us back? Is this the same Maitri that I’m going to loose?? Who can anyone understand how hard it is for a parent when their loved ones cry for their loved ones? The same saga continued for a couple of years deadlocked from everywhere without an inch of improvement in any co-ordinates. Someone had to release the deadlock, but who the best person could be other than Guri? Poor Maitri having cried for years, neither had tears nor any of the options left in her. It’s not that, Guri wasn’t bothered, but in spite of their stiff opposition he still dared several attempts visiting her house and assuring them of his love, care and financial security for their daughter etc after convincing his parents. But, Sumathi locked herself in the room and didn’t even come out to see him. When her dad only explained him to stay away from her during their 2 hour discussion, Guri had to return to his room completely broken. Maitri cried the whole night shouting at them. Everyone was stubborn in their own ways. With the increased problems, love only increased and Maitri in turn became even more powerful and her perseverance became stronger. Sumathi’s only brother, supportive of Maitri continuously tried explaining the consequence to them they might have to face in the end for this deadlocked situation. Hence Sumathi slowly felt loosing the grounds, became weaker and realized that her options didn’t carry enough weight; she has to loose her only daughter for ever and win her tradition and that she didn’t want to win the game by loosing her only loving daughter. A child can leave a mother when she is not in need anymore, but can mother ever leave a child that she has given birth? So, once she decided to accept her defeat, the least thing she could do was try convincing some of their relatives that Gurinder was indeed a Punjabi Brahmin and for others where she couldn’t control herself, she could only shed all her pain filled tears. She politely told my mother, that she was always proud of her daughter, but not anymore; my mother in turn could only lend her shoulder to Sumathi so she could cry as much as possible.


One day, I was at Onsite, when my mother informed me of her marriage in a simple way without a celebration. But later, I guess they decided to have it in a grand way where most of the rituals went on for 2 days - One in the typical Punjabi style of Gaana and Naachna, and the other in a simplified Madhwa style. After a many round of negotiations and requests, Gurinder’s family agreed for not serving non vegetarian food in their delicious lungar. Sumathi just closed her tear filled eyes at Gurudwar when Sardarjis were chanting “Waahe Guru….“Oh lord Krishna, I have surrendered my whole life to you and this is what I deserve finally… take me away please..” Yet, most of the traditional seniors from Maitri’s family provided reasons for not making it to the event and Sumathi as a normal mother, continuously shed her tears at the wedding, but for a different reason. Maitri had clearly warned her, “Ma,, promise me you wont create any drama in the wedding.. Don’t cry for me please…Guri is not what you have thought. He’s extremely nice guy”. Even after the wedding, Sumathi kept on crying while her husband only tried to pacify her, though he was sobbing even harder inside. As, I was in Memphis that time creating and fixing bugs in those Accounts Payable applications that I was working, I didn’t have a chance to attend that eventful wedding. 

After my return from the US a couple of years ago, I happened to see her in a house warming ceremony along with her twin kids, Amandeep and Karanjit. Though she appeared to have lost her original charm that she possessed, her dress sense was still as great as before. She had worn a simple blue Saree that attracted the entire crew in the floor. I smiled at her.. She seemed to be leading a successful married life, juggling between her interests, culture and that of Guri’s… Guri couldn’t make it to the function as he was on his US trip as a Principal Technical Architect, but I understood he was leading a successful carrier and trying to keep her happy to his best, though at times he’s irked when she starts off with an hour long alaap in Vilambit Ek Taal or have a lengthy music related chat with her Tablist friend. Guri’s mother never listened or admired any of her songs even once. Aman and Karan are fine, eating meat along with their paternal grandparents, and Maitri is only concerned when her parents were around. I asked about her musical journey. She looked at her naughty kids and gave me that naughty smile, “Well, I recorded couple of solo’s for an album…” ..her sentence stopped. Normally she doesn’t talk if she is not interested and hence I decided to change the subject. I knew for sure, she was much more capable than that. She also knew I had established myself in music during my long stint in the US and facing issues starting back in India due to my troubled allergies. “All the best, Vishu…” she bid bye without even looking at me and turned at her kids, “Chalo bachho..hogona”, took off before I could start the new topic. 

Well, unfortunately in this form of game, “Draw” is quite uncommon… Somebody needs to win and somebody loose. One’s gain is another’s loss. Her parents though enjoy the company of their grand kids regret for their failure to pass on that enormous cultural heritage to their super talented daughter or her sons. Sumathi almost stopped giving concerts and performing on TV Channels, but continue to teach her old students considering that as divine. Her husband took voluntary retirement and kept himself busy in taking care of their household stuff. Guri’s parents clearly discriminate her against their own daughter and other members and never accepted her as one of their folks. His mother always complained that she doesn’t care for them the way she does for her lone suffering parents. She could never tolerate her son talking to Maitri in Kannada. That’s probably because even Maitri could never accept them just as she accepted Guri, though she tried to act and prove she cared for them. There was always a cold rift between her and his parents for various reasons. From her point of view, she left her entire life and future for him fighting with her dear parents for years and yet doesn’t get acceptance in his family. The upset Maitri, fought and cried when her kids were named against her wishes without much of a support. Guri always tried bridging the gaps between her and his mother, but it didn’t work the way it miraculously worked before marriage. The couple had special motivational cause those days to please their respective future in-laws which is not needed anymore. She knows, it’s not his fault and now she doesn’t even have time to think if she did the right thing or not. Anyways, there is no UNDO in life. You just have to move on and can only correct the present tense. Some gets an easy nod and acceptance, while some struggle a bit while some fail or end in a tragedy...but life goes on.. Whatever the case is, I’m sure every case carried some story. 

By the way, why did I remember Maitri’s tale now? May be after seeing this equally talented, beautiful and transformed Sri Vidya? “Beautiful girls hardly remain single?:)”…Well, I restricted myself for not making any conclusion about this glam girl and just stepped towards my house from their place, while I noticed the Hero Honda guy was still combing his hair outside. After reaching my house, I was dumb for a moment after hearing from my 4 year old little one explaining the dance sequence with her boy friend Dhruva, for their annual day celebrations. Without having prepared myself what to even react, I silently smiled at myself and started planning towards my Sunday routine after witnessing my daughter’s dancing steps.... :-) 


3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi Vish,

this is one of your fans. Amidst the crowd, I was kinda lost in deciding what is right or what is wrong. But after followig these 2 parts, things are prettty clear to me. I can now feel the others' hearts. I know, there are millions of Maithri and Guri. What I feel, if things are genuine, it should not be broken down. I may be wrong. But during the long run, I feel, it will overcome every negative.

- The 19-16 alpha human (I dont wanna disclose my identity, but still could not help commenting :), it was so best :)

Unknown said...

Amazing sir. I felt the ending is closure to reality unlike any film story.

Vishwesh Bhat said...

Thanks Yala, Film story normally ends once they get married after all the hurdles.. So I tried going an extra mile to show the reality.. :)